Psalm 34:4
So why have my own blog when there are so many other ex-JWs out there who already have one and already have all the information?
Well, I honestly didn’t ever think I’d start one. I figured there was enough information and testimonies out there already. But this was one thing I felt the Spirit leading me to do when I prayed about what this ministry is going to look like. Each testimony and person’s style is unique and different. My testimony and style just might reach certain ones that others don’t. I’m still in the very early stages of this and it seems to be slow moving most of the time then all of a sudden it’s busy and growing. Like lately, things have been slow moving as I’ve been dealing with other spiritual issues within my church. An issue has come up that I need to take a step of faith in and stand up for the truth of God and his word. In love of course. It may come at a cost and isn’t going to be easy, because it’s something that others may not see eye to eye with, and they may judge and not like me. However, I am not here to please men. I am here to please God. My life is not my own and I owe it all to Him. This is an issue that those walking with God need to come to his understanding on, especially those who are leaders in the church and have influence on new believers. It’s an issue that much of the church throughout the world has bended and swayed to the world on. I am not going to address the issue here because it’s not yet dealt with, as I have not yet met with our Pastor about it, but I am on Wednesday. I may or may not share it after the fact because it doesn’t have anything to do with JWs, or Ex-JW issues and that is my main focus. In other news, I have had the opportunity and courage to finally share things with my JW mom. I and others had been praying lots beforehand that she would be open and willing to discuss things, that it would be peaceable, that I’d have wisdom to speak to her, that I’d be able to speak the truth in love and not debate or argue. Well all those things happened. Prayers were answered. Even if my mom didn’t completely agree, or anything change in her faith as a JW (that I know of), I still was able to plant seeds and get her thinking about some issues. She didn’t cut me off, hang up, get angry or argue. The most important thing to me was that she recognized where I’m coming from, where my heart is. That I truly and deeply care for her and love her. I’m not trying to attack. I’m not trying to fight nor am I angry or hurt. It ended well and I thought I had a little break through. However the next day she had messaged me about the 607 BCE/Fall of Jerusalem miscalculation issue that we had discussed in our conversation, and sent me some JW org website articles about it and said she didn’t want to discuss anything further with me. I honestly immediately got discouraged. I thought that we weren’t going to be able to discuss anything further in the future either and that she’d cut me off. Well, one of the main issues I addressed with her was the Australian Royal Commission Child Abuse investigation hearings and others cases around the world (You can find links to these at the bottom of this post). She looked into it all after wards. She then messaged me and said she’d be up in my area visiting some others and she wanted to get together. I was so worried and filled with fear and anxiety, that she was going to come just for a quick discussion to tell me that she was hurt and didn’t want to talk to me about JW issues and she wasn’t going to be able to continue our relationship. I figured if not though, if she just was coming to truly visit, that I wouldn’t bring anything up myself, that she would have to. Thankfully, my fears were all for nothing. She came and spent the afternoon and over night with us last Monday. It was a pleasant visit with her and then the next morning while we were having coffee and eating breakfast, she brought up the Child Abuse and Two-Witness rule issues that I had presented to her. She herself being a victim of child sexual abuse, could relate to these situations. She was very calm about it, and after discussing it more, she came to the conclusion that yes this two-witness rule should be changed and she hopes it will but that it’s not going to change her involvement with the religion, or her faith. She said because there must be some reason that the Governing Body stands by the rule and that they may change it like other things that have changed in the past because of better understanding on things. We did get on to the subject of Jesus not being Michael the Arch Angel at the end of our conversation and I read to her Hebrews 1. Hebrews 1, if you do not know, is very instrumental in proving Jesus is not Michael the Archangel and that he is the second person in the Godhead or trinity. She pondered what I was trying to say and I really felt like it had her stumped a tiny bit but then she brings up Proverbs 8:22-30 where yes, it does very much seem like it’s Jesus and proves that he can’t be God, and that he was created. However, this is speaking of Wisdom and it’s a personification of Wisdom and wisdom here and in Chapter 9 is a female personification. Our conversation then ended because she was trying to find something from the JW website and couldn’t. Said she’d have to find it when she got home. I haven’t heard anything from her yet and I didn’t want to push things so I am waiting but soon, I will try to continue the conversation. God was speaking a lot to me before my discussions with my mom, because I was so worried and fearful that I would mess things up. That’d I’d get too worked up in trying to prove my points and convince her. I feared that I’d throw too much at her too and she’d just cut me off and I’d do more damage than any good. Thankfully, God, he is such a good good Father and speaks to us. I was reading a daily devotion through my Bible App on my phone called “Resting In His Power”. The description of the devotion reads: “There is a sacred anxiety when believers feel called to minister, especially when distracted by an awareness of their inadequacies. But God is more concerned with the condition of the heart n willingness to respond than a person’s abilities or inabilities.” This was exactly where I was and what I was dealing with. I felt like when Moses was called to speak and deliver the Israelites from Egypt. How he responded that he was not good at speaking. I am not good at speaking. I am not eloquent with words and I often have trouble finding the right words or the way to express ideas. I stumble a lot and my mind goes blank. Especially when I am nervous. God has been using Moses A LOT to speak to me this year. It’s how he very first confirmed for me that I am being called and sent to this ministry. There have been other times that he’s used Moses to speak to me and then he did this. The devotional spoke of Moses on day 3, and through all the days (it’s only a 3 day devotional), it spoke to me a lot about trusting him to be my strength in my weakness, that it’s the power of the Holy Spirit in me that can accomplish anything, I have to trust that. He won’t lead me into failure. “His Spirit is going to make up the difference, whether you bring 1 percent to the table or 88 percent. He brings 100 percent…every time.” Just like when I very first gave my life to him, I was so scared, I was hesitant, I felt as if I was about to take a step off a cliff and fall, hoping that he was going to catch me… save me… and he did! This was the same thing for me. Taking that step, that leap into the unknown… Time after time after time… God just wants us to trust and believe! That what faith is all about. Trusting in what we cannot see… the unknown. Believing he will be there to carry us and do for us what we can’t do. “I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me!” (Phil. 4:13 ) The last part of Day 3 says, “You may feel burdened for a ministry that you’re not prepared for. You don’t feel comfortable in that role. Your ability or last of it is pronounced and very obvious to all around.” Which is very true because put me up in front of a group or even in confronting 1 individual when it’s a tough situation like with my mom, my lack of ability is very obvious in the fact that I shake, my voice trembles, I get flushed and don’t know what to do. But “God only expects for you to be obedient, regardless of your comfort level. He’s got this.” And He did. He DOES. I now have confidence to go further, keep moving forward and having faith that he is working and he is my power. You can too. Just give even 1 percent and he will do the rest! Much love to you and God Bless! Australia Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse Case 54: http://www.childabuseroyalcommission.gov.au/case-study/10908a67-70c5-4103-94cc-dac096fdb585/case-study-54,-march-2017,-sydney Case29: http://www.childabuseroyalcommission.gov.au/case-study/636f01a5-50db-4b59-a35e-a24ae07fb0ad/case-study-29,-july-2015,-Sydney Jehovah's Witnesses are being fined $4k per day for withholding documents from the courts, of pedophiles within the organization: https://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/local/Jehovahs-Witnesses-Face-LegalFinancial-Penalties-in-Court-Case-456790543.html
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AuthorWELCOME! Hi, I'm Brittany. Archives
June 2020
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